The Story of Sam Grest: The Boy Who Never Belonged
by S.L. Gibbs
Summary: When I'd first met Darren and Evra, I'd told them all these crazy stories about my loving parents, my annoying siblings and my hilarious school friends. I've been apart of the Cirque du Freak for two months and still no-one knows the truth... Warning: Depression, self harm and domestic violence. No actual pairings but some implied.
1. Blood Brothers

**Hi, there ;D I really wanted to write a fic about Sammy cuz he's one of my favourite characters. It sucks that he died ): So in this fic, he doesn't die but joins the Cirque :D Oh, and by the way - I know that a half-vampire can't change a human into a half-vampire but in my world they can ;D Please review.**

**Disclaimer:**

Sam: SL-nee-sama doesn't own _The Saga of Darren Shan _or any of it's characters.

SL: Good boy. *Pats head*

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><p>"Let's be blood brothers," Sam announced.<p>

"Blood brothers?" I echoed.

"We both make cuts and mix our blood together," He explained.

"I-I can't." I said lamely.

"Why not? You scared of a little blood?" He teased.

"Of course not!" I cried, giving into him.

I took the piece of glass out of his hand and made a cut in my left palm. I handed it back to him and he did the same. We then pressed our hands together. I could smell his blood and I was finding it hard not to bring his hand to my mouth and drink from him, which really disgusted me.

All of a sudden he fell to his knees and cried out in pain.

"Sam?" I exclaimed. "What's wrong? Are you okay?"

After a moment or two, he stood up. He looked dazed but no longer in pain.

"Whoa," He murmured.

"M-maybe I should take you to the Cirque," I told him.

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><p>Mr. Crepsley watched me and Sam with a stern expression as we told him what had happened. When we had finished, he asked me in an almost inaudible voice,<p>

"Darren, may I speak with you privately for a moment?"

"Um, sure, Mr. Crepsley," I replied as I followed him into his tent. "So, what is it you wanted to tell me?"

"Darren?" He said without looking at me. "Do you member how I turned you into a half-vampire?"

"Of course," I answered as I glanced at my fingertips. "You mixed our blood…" My voice broke off when I realized what he was saying. "I-I didn't, did I?"

"I think you did," Mr. Crepsley said dryly. "You will have to tell him."

I nodded even though he had his back to me and I went back outside to where Sam was.

"So, did he say what's wrong with me?" Sam enquired.

I looked at the ground and nodded.

"Well?" He pushed.

"Um, Sam?" I muttered, still not looking at him. "You know how before you asked me if you could join the Cirque?"

"Yeah," He frowned. "You said Mr. Tall said no."

"Well, um, now you're going to have to,"

"What do you mean?"

"I turned you into a half-vampire."

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><p>I stared at Darren, my mouth agape. Did he just say that he had turned me into a half-vampire? He must be joking! I let out a fake laugh.<p>

"Funny!" I exclaimed. "You nearly had me there!"

"I'm not joking," Darren replied. "When we mixed blood, I changed you into a half-vampire."

I laughed again. "I thought you had to drink a person's blood to turn them into a vampire. And what the heck is a half-vampire anyway?"

"I'm a half-vampire," He told me. "And that's just a myth."

"Alright, suppose that you are a half-vampire," I murmured. "What's the different between a half-vampire and a full vampire?"

"Well, half-vampires can move about during the day whereas full vampires can't. And full vampires are a lot stronger and can move faster. I don't really know all that much myself – I haven't been a half-vampire for very long." He shrugged.

"So, you changed me into a half-vampire?" I said, no longer able to keep the excitement out of my voice. "That's so cool!"

"You'll have to leave you're family and drink human blood," He told me. "You think that's cool?"

"I don't have to kill the people I drink from, do I?" I asked.

"Well, no…"

"Then I better go home and pack."


	2. The Change

**I know I said I wasn't going to update this fic until I had finished Daryl Shan but I had promised that I'd update all of my fics on Friday the 13th in honor of how I excited I was for Haunt the Halls: Monster High Day. This day was actually a big let down but a promise is a promise so here it is.**

**Disclaimer:**

Darren: SL-nee-sama doesn't own _The Saga of Darren Shan _or any of it's characters.

SL: I can't think of anything original to say so *thumbs up*.

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><p>Darren was standing behind me, watching me. I could see his reflection in the mirror. He looked worried. Terrified, even. I turned away from the suitcase I was packing to look at him.<p>

"What's wrong?" I asked him.

"Nothing," He shrugged. "It's just that, being a vampire isn't exactly one of life's greatest luxuries. I kind of feel guilty about dragging you into it."

I laughed. "Darren, don't feel guilty. I wanted all along to be part of the Cirque and now I've got what I wanted. And besides, vampires are cool."

He smiled. "I guess that makes me feel a little better. But it was hard for me, leaving behind my friends and family. Are you sure you'll be okay with that?"

I turned around and didn't say anything.

"Sam?" He called. "Sam? Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine," I lied. "Let me just finish packing so we can get out of here before my parents get back."

"Okay," He muttered but I could tell he didn't believe me.

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><p>"Hey, Evra! Look who's here!" Darren cried dramatically as the two of us entered his and Evra's tent.<p>

"Oh, hey, Sam," Evra smiled. "Shouldn't you be at home by now?"

"This is home now," I answered. "I've joined the Cirque du Freak."

"But I thought Mr. Tall said no." Evra replied.

"Darren accidentally turned me into a half-vampire."

Evra tilted his head at Darren but didn't say anything more about it. "Well, welcome to the Cirque du Freak. Who's your roommate?"

"I don't know yet, Mr. Tall said I could choose for now."

"I was thinking that we could be roommates, since we're both half-vampires now." Darren announced.

Evra frowned. "What about me?"

"What about you?" Darren teased.

Evra stuck his snakey tongue out at the half-vampire. "You'd much rather be my roommate, wouldn't you, Sam?"

"Er…"

"No! I asked first!"

"I was talking to Sam, Vampalina!"

"Hey, watch it, Snakey!"

"Who'd you think you're calling Snakey?"

"You! Who else?"

After that I stopped listening to their argument. I suddenly started to feel dizzy and my legs were no longer supporting me. I remember voices I didn't recognize asking me if I was okay and then I feel to the ground and everything went black.

* * *

><p>"He's waking up!"<p>

"Shh!"

I opened my eyes and blinked twice. Evra and Darren were staring down at me with worried expressions on their faces. I noticed Mr. Crepsley was there too but he wasn't all up in my face like Evra and Darren were.

"A little space, please."

They laughed and apologized, moving to give me room to sit up.

"What happened?" I asked, rubbing my head.

"You fainted." Darren explained.

"You should be okay…for now." Mr. Crepsley told me. "It's your human cells fighting with the vampire cells that caused it."

"But I never fainted." Darren pointed out.

Mr. Crepsley didn't say anything for a moment or two and I could've sworn I saw a hint of worry in his expression. "The change is different for everyone." He muttered before turning on his heal and exiting the tent swiftly.

Darren watched Mr. Crepsley leave silently. When he was gone, the half-vampire turned to me with a fake smile plastered on his face. "Don't worry, Sam! You'll be better soon."

"Yeah," Evra agreed although I could tell neither of them believed it.


	3. An Old Friend

**Hey, guys! I'm back! Sorry if this sucks, I'm still trying to get used to writing again (I haven't been writing original stuff either, I'm terrible Dx). Oh, and **_Ozuma thy AWESOME Vampanatic 8 _**is going to start writing again too so go read his stuff (Lol, me and my free advertising).**

**Disclaimer: **I haven't suddenly aquired the rights to _The Saga of Darren Shan _since the last chapter.

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><p><strong>Sam's POV<strong>

Puking. In a random bush. Feel like I'm about to faint again. My head is going to explode.

"Hey, kid!"

I try to say 'what' but it just comes out as a loud moan.

"Are you okay? Do you need help?"

"Uh..."

And then I faint again.

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><p><strong>? POV<strong>

I sigh and pull the kid out of his puke. I swing him over my shoulder and look around. I can see a load of tents and caravans in the distance so I decide to head that way, figuring it must be some sort of camp or a circus. If the kid doesn't live there then they might have a phone I can borrow to call an ambulance or something.

I trudge in the general direction of the tents. Damn, this kid is heavier than he looks! This is what I get for helping people. When I finally get there though, I nearly faint myself.

In front of me I see someone I never expected to see again. Same bright blue eyes, same jet-black hair, same smile. I know it's him instantly. I never truly believed he was dead.

Then he turns away from the green-skinned...thing he's talking to and looks at me. His eyes widen. A smile plays at his lips but it's gone as soon as it appeared. His eyes fall to the unconscious kid on my shoulder.

"Sam!" He cries and he rushes towards me, followed by Green-Skin Boy.

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><p><strong>Sam's POV<strong>

I hear Darren's voice. He's speaking to someone who's voice I don't recognize. I open my eyes. I'm in Darren's tent. How did I get here?

Darren comes running from the other side of the tent to help me sit up. He's smiling but the smile doesn't quite reach his eyes.

"This is like the 5th time you've fainted this week," He tries to sound nonchalant but I can hear the worry in his voice.

"How did I get here?" I ask, ignoring the statement even though I know it's true.

"Steve brought you hear," He beams, indicating a grey-haired boy who's watching us from the corner of the tent.

He blinks. "Hi,"

"Er, hi," I reply.

"Sam, Steve was a friend of mine before I became a half-vampire," Darren explained. "Steve, this is my friend, Sam. He's also a half-vampire."

Steve continues to blink at me half-heartedly. "I see."

"Anyway, Sam," Darren laughs awkwardly. "How are you feeling? Would you like something to drink?"

I shake my head. "Thanks but I'd rather just get some sleep."

"Okay," He turns to Steve. "Come on, Steve. I want to introduce you to Mr. Crepsley."

Steve gets up, smiles a creepy smile at me then follows Darren out of the tent.

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><p><strong>Just pointing out that in this fic, the whole thing with Steve at the graveyard never happened. So he didn't know that Darren was a vampire, Darren told him while Sam was unconscious.<strong>


	4. You're Creepy

**So before I begin this chapter there's something I'm a little curious about. I was wondering if any of you guys would be interested in reading some of my original stuff? I mean, I'm pretty shy about showing people my original writing for some reason but I was just wondering whether it would interest any of you. Meh.**

**Disclaimer:** My name isn't Darren Shan.

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><p>This morning I woke up in a place I didn't recognize, face down in my own puke. It's a mystery why I didn't drown in it. I've been walking around aimlessly since then, trying to find my way back to the Cirque and figure out what the hell happened to me last night but I just seem to be getting more and more lost.<p>

But then, as I'm walking past a shop, I see _her_ threw the window. Her icy, blue eyes cut threw me like a knife. There are a few fresh cuts and bruises on her face but apart from that she looks exactly the same. I don't know if _he's _with her but I don't get a chance to find out because Darren appears out of nowhere and tackles me to the floor.

"Sam!" He cries, sitting up on top of me.

"Ow," I mutter.

"Sorry,"

He gets off of me and helps me stand. Steve is slumping behind him, looking aloof and pouty. I imagine him wearing a pair of sunglasses while smoking a cigarette. I giggle to myself.

Darren waves a hand in front of my face_. "Hello?"_

"Sorry, what?"

"Where _were _you?" Darren whines like a 5-year-old.

"I don't know," I shrug."I just woke up in some weird alleyway this morning."

Steve chuckles evilly but Darren either doesn't hear him or is ignoring him.

"Okay," Darren says, looking at me strangely. "Let's go back to the Cirque. But stop disappearing, okay?"

I nod.

* * *

><p>I stare. Steve stares back. This goes on for a while. I bet Steve could've kept this up forever. But after a while I start to get uncomfortable.<p>

"Come on, Steve! I know you know what happened!"

He smiles that creepy smile of his. I back away. That smile always unnerves me.

"I knocked you out and left you in an alleyway," He admits.

I frown. "Why?"

"I was hoping it would keep you away from Darren for at least a day but of course he wanted to go look for you." He rolls his eyes.

"You're...creepy." I say.

"I know."

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><p><strong>Sorry this chapter's so short. And I'd like to give a shoutout to <strong>_demonwindy. _**People like you are what makes writing fanfiction worth while XD**


	5. Only Manly Men Hug

I. Love. You. Guys. So. Much. *Bishie face* Since I made my comeback I've been getting so many reviews and messages saying things like "I love your work." and "You're my favourite FF writer." I'm so inspired *punches air* This also means that you might be seeing some original stuff by me. *Dramatically points at my two favourite OCs* It's your time to shine, fools!

Steve: Are you high...?

SL: Yes, on luuuurve C:

Steve: Okay...well, S.L. Gibbs does not own _The Saga of Darren Shan _or any of it's characters.

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><p>So all the other chapters have begun with puke. I think that joke is getting kind of old so we'll skip to the part where I'm tied to a tree. Steve must have knocked me out again and left me here.<p>

I try to wriggle free but I'm bound too tightly. Damn that Steve! I sigh and relax. Darren will probably find me eventually. And I guess now would be a good time to think. After all, I have a lot to think about.

It's been a few weeks now since I joined the Cirque and became a half-vampire. I can't remember exactly how many. But even with Steve harassing me and my constant vomiting, I'd rather be here than back at home with _them._

Which 'them' am I referring to, you ask? Why, by 'them' I mean my parents. Or rather, my mom and her husband. I never called him dad before and I don't want to start now.

My real dad I don't remember much about. He died when I was still a baby. A heart attack. Mom was grief-stricken. She struggled to look after me by herself and I probably would have ended up in care. But then _he_ showed up.

He was good-looking and rich – perfect, right? Mom married him straight away. At first they were so in love – they did everything together and seemed so happy. But then he turned nasty. He cheated on her a lot. And there was nothing she could do about it because whenever she tried to talk to him, he'd hit her. He hit me too. But not as much as her. All I could do was watch from the other room, my eyes wide with horror.

Around that time was also when the bullying started. I was never wildly popular in school, but we lived in a small town where news travelled fast. The other kids at school found out about my less than great home-life. At first it was just verbal abuse, ("Who's your dad sleeping with today, Sammy?", "Is your mom out of the asylum yet?") but there was one particular instance where- no, I won't go into that. It's still hard for me to think about. Sometimes I wake up at night and think I'm still there, behind the school, their laughing voices all around me, screaming my lungs out.

Just then, I hear a sharp, slap-noise that jolts me out of my thoughts. I look up and see Darren, just having slapped Steve in the face.

"I told you to stop doing this to him!"

Steve shrugs. He looks a little surprised at his friend's violent outburst but he's grinning. So is Darren, although he's trying not to.

Darren rushes over and unties me, then he gives me a big hug.

"Men don't hug," Steve says drily.

Darren scoffs at him, then releases me only to give Steve an even bigger hug.

"No, only manly men do," He mutters.

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><p>I didn't know I was this good at writing depressing things o.o I mean, I don't think this chapter is amazing compared to any of my others but people who read my stuff have probably noticed that one of my flaws is that my paragraphs are never long enough. But with this one the words just seemed to flow easier. Look at dat four-line paragraph right thur. Look at it.<p>

Anyway, I'm going to repeat what I said earlier: I love you guys. Thankyou so much for your kind words *flails arms*


	6. Fire

**So I didn't properly thank all of the lovely people who helped me with this fic when I was stuck. I had no idea what I wanted to do with this at first but it's slowly becoming my favourite. Thanks to everyone who gave me suggestions and encouraged me! Also, this chapter is loooong C: Well, longer than usual.**

Disclaimer: I tried to write a better disclaimer but it won't show up for some reason. Ugh, why have I been having so many problems with FF lately? Anyway, I don't own _The Saga of Darren Shan_.

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><p>Fire. It's all around me. It hurts. It'll burn me to a crisp in a matter of seconds. I hear screaming. Is that my voice? I can't even tell anymore. I also hear laughter. Evil, psychotic laughter. I'm going to die here, I know it.<p>

And who cares if I die? I have no friends, no real family. If death comes – when it comes – I'll welcome it. I'll thank the people who brought it upon me. Even hell would be better than this awful life I'm forced to live.

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><p>My eyes snap open and suddenly I'm sitting up in my hammock in the corner of Evra and Darren's tent. I hear a horrible, shrieking noise. No wait, that's me. I'm screaming and I can't stop.<p>

Evra and Darren rush over.

"What's wrong, Sam?" Darren cries, his eyes wide. In the back of my mind I compare him to a shota character in an anime. Don't...ask how I know what 'shota' means.

"Are you okay?" Evra asks. "Did you have a bad dream?"

I nod, no longer wailing but gasping for breath. Sweat is pouring off me by the gallon and my heart is thumping wildly.

"Need...a drink," I cough.

Darren bobs his head up and down a few times then rushes out of the tent to get me a cup of something.

Evra studies me silently as I curl up into a ball, my head in my hands. I've had this dream before but it's never felt so...real. I can almost feel where the fire had licked me.

"Are you okay?" Evra asks again.

"No," I say softly.

I hear him chuckle sadly as he sits next to me on the hammock. We then wait in silence for Darren to return. After a while I calm down but my throat is dry and I have a killer headache.

Darren emerges after what feels like hours. He has Steve and Mr. Crepsley with him, Mr. Crepsley carrying a glass of human blood.

"Drink this," He says quietly, handing me the glass. I do what I'm told although the idea of drinking blood is still a little weird for me.

I polish off the glass quickly. Mr. Crepsley, Darren and Evra watch me with a look of worry spread across their faces. Even Steve looks a little less standoffish than usual.

"How do you feel?" Darren asks expectantly.

"Better," I croak. "No wait..."

And then the vomit comes up.

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><p>"Tell me, Mr. Crepsley! Why is this happening?"<p>

"He is just going through the Change-"

"But it's been weeks! Shouldn't the Change be complete by now?"

"I should be but..."

"But what?"

"I do not want to worry you..."

"I'm already worried!"

"Alright, I shall be honest with you."

"Well?"

"He is dying."

"Oh..."

"His body was not meant for this. It is rejecting the Change. That is why he throws up whenever he drinks blood. Eventually it will prove too much for him and he will perish."

"Is there anything we can do?"

"I will do everything in my power to prevent this from happening but the odds do not look good."

"But there's a chance, right?"

"Yes, but it is very slim. It will require making a deal with Destiny himself."

"You mean...?"

"Indeed."

"Well, if it's for Sam..."

Darren and Mr. Crepsley are whispering to one another outside the tent. They think I'm sound asleep, that I can't hear a word they're saying.

I already knew I was dying. I could tell by the troubled look on Mr. Crepsley's face. I've always been pretty good at reading people.

I sigh and roll over. I cover my ear with a pillow so I can no longer hear Darren and Mr. Crepsley's hushed conversation. It takes a while, but I eventually fall asleep.

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><p><strong>Guys, guys! Guess what! *Flails arms* I have Deviantart now. Well, I've had Deviantart for a year but I made an account just for my writing. Go watch me, it might encourage me to actually upload something xD Username is SL-Gibbs.<strong>


	7. Boy Girl

**A/N:** I'm so sorry for not updating in forever, guys! I don't actually have an excuse, I guess I just wasn't feeling motivated. But I hope this super-long chapter makes up for it! I think this is my first chapter to have over 1,000 words before I added in the ANs.

**Disclaimer:** I do not own _The Saga of Darren Shan _or anything affiliated with it. I only own this story and my little Rena c:

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><p><strong>Sam's Memories Part 1<strong>

I'm still screaming even though the fire's been put out. Why didn't I die back there? Who saved me?

"You can stop screaming now."

I open my eyes then blink a few times to clear my vision. There's someone kneeling opposite me, beaming. They have unusually-styled black hair and dark blue eyes that look almost purple. I can't even tell whether they're a boy or a girl.

The person laughs at my confused expression. "Hi, I'm Rena," Rena's a girls' name, right? "You owe me for saving you back there. How about we become friends?"

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><p><strong>Sam's POV<strong>

Darren has been looking at me strangely ever since last night's little event. When I look back at him he smiles shyly then looks away, only for the process to start again in a few minutes' time.

Evra has been acting pretty off too. He hardly ever hangs out in the tent and he always looks sad whenever we bump into each other. As for Mr. Crepsley and Steve, I haven't seen either of them since last night.

"Sam!" Darren cries as he strolls over to my side of the tent. He has a huge grin plastered on his face but that somehow makes him look even more miserable.

"Hi," I croak, forcing myself to smile back.

"How are you feeling?" He questions.

"Awful," I answer honestly.

"You should go back to bed then. Evra and I will take care of your chores."

"No, that's okay," I tell him. "I think some fresh air will help me feel better."

"Okay then..." He starts fidgeting and looking around the tent.

"What do you really want to ask me?"

He looks surprised but he asks anyway. "What was your nightmare about?"

"Vampires," I joke.

He smiles weakly. "No, really."

"Just something that happened to me when I was younger."

"Do you want to talk about it?"

I shake my head.

He frowns. I can tell he wants to know but he respects my wishes and walks away. He turns around and winks at me before he leaves.

* * *

><p><strong>Sam's Memories Part 2<strong>

"Who are you anyway?" I call after Rena as she (?) skips ahead of me.

"I'm Rena."

"No, I know that but..."

"Rena Montgomery. I'm in your class."

"Oh. I'm Sam Gr-"

"I know. We sit next to each other."

"We do?"

"Yeah but I hardly ever come to school. I get bullied. The other kids call me a boy-girl."

I don't know how to respond to that so I don't say anything.

"It's okay to ask about my gender, you know. I won't be offended."

I look up, surprised. Rena's not even facing me, yet (s)he somehow knew what I was thinking about.

"O-okay, so are you a boy or a girl?" I ask.

"Not telling!"

I frown.

"My gender isn't important. If you're my friend you'll like me no matter what my sex is."

He...she...it has a point.

"And if you're confused about whether to refer to me as a he or a she, just go with whichever one you want."

I tilt my head to the side. Is this kid some sort of mind-reader?

"No, I'm not a mind-reader. I just get this a lot."

"You're...weird," I say after a while. "I like you."

* * *

><p><strong>Larten's POV<strong>

"It's nice to see you again, Larten. Is this a social visit?"

I stare at the man in front of me in disgust. I despise him. Everything about him from the top of his head down to his ridiculous Wellington boots. But he also unnerves me. I stand up straight and try not to look too afraid as I tell him, "You know this is not a social visit."

Mr. Tiny chuckles. It sets my teeth on edge. "You're here about the boy. The half-vampire. Sam, is it?"

"Indeed."

He pauses for a second to caress his heart-shaped watch. Probably more to agitate me than anything else.

"The poor boy," He says in mock sympathy. "A vampire who can't drink blood! What are the chances of that?"

"I do not know," I answer, annoyance obvious in my voice. "That is why I am here."

"Patience, Larten!" He gasps in that irritatingly smug voice of his. "You will get your answers soon enough."

I roll my eyes like a teenager. I must be hanging around Darren too much.

"So how have things been? Settled down and got yourself a mate yet?" He wiggles his eyebrows cheekily as he says this. I glare at him.

"Alright! Alright!" He laughs. "The boy is going to die and there's nothing you can do about it."

I am just about to run over and attempt to strangle him when he shouts, "Just kidding!" I stop myself and regain my composure.

"You mean there is something I can do?" I enquire.

"No, there is something the boy can do on his own. He may get help from the other half-vampire or even the human or snake-boy but no adult vampires must interfere. If you do, you will die."

"So what does he have to do?"

"He must kill and drain his family, only then can he truly move on from all that has happened in his past life."

"What?"

"Well, he doesn't have to kill his family – I'd just like to see that. And I wasn't kidding about the moving on part. All that kid does is whine over how he was bullied and how his step-dad was abusive." He pulls a face.

"Just tell me what he really has to do," I sigh.

"The boy has a rare disease in vampires. In fact, it's so rare that it's believed to have died out millennia ago. Someone cunning must have planted the disease in the boy just before Darren blooded him." Desmond Tiny winked to confirm just who that someone was. "That someone is also the only person in the world with the antidote. If the boy does something for me, I will give him the antidote. No conditions. Pinky swear." He holds up a large, pink finger.

"No, thankyou," I would rather dress in drag than touch that pinky. "So what does he have to do for you?"

"Nothing too complicated. He just has to kill someone."

"Can you not just do it yourself?"

"I could, but it would be more fun this way."

I grimace at him.

"He was a servant of mine - neither vampire, human or vampaneze. Had a lot of potential. But he betrayed me and ran away. I will send someone to the Cirque to give you full details later, as for now you just run on home and inform little Sam of his task."

"But what if he does not want to do it?"

He shrugs. "If he doesn't do it, he dies."

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><p><strong>AN:** Rena is all mine, just so you know xD I'd be willing to share him/her with Sam though /shot. Rena is pronounced reh-nah, rather than ree-nah just in case anyone was wondering lol. And he/she does have a gender but I'm not gonna tell you guys cuz I'm mean c: (Totally not obsessed with my own OC)

Anyway, thanks again for reading and leaving sweet messages/reviews. Sorry I neglected you all for so long lol


	8. Black Uniform

**A/N: **Hello, my squishies! I'm back again! I actually do have an excuse for not updating this time but I won't post it here. Thankyou for being patient with me and thankyou for sending me up-lifting messages and reviews as usual! Please don't stop because I'm a lonely human xD

**Disclaimer: **If I was Darren Shan, why would I be writing fanfiction about my own books?

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><p><strong>Sam's Memories<strong>

I pick at my finger nails, kick my legs, re-adjust my school tie for the tenth time. My mom used to hit me over the head playfully and tell me to stop fidgeting. I've always fidgeted when I was nervous, just as I'm doing right now. If she was here right now (without _him_, of course) she would probably push me off this wall and call me a worry wart.

Before Rena had trotted off with that silly grin on her face yesterday, she had told me to meet her by the school's back gate before lessons started. Which is where I am now. Waiting. Fidgeting. Worrying. I know that there's probably nothing to worry about but I keep thinking that she won't turn up, that this was all some cruel joke just to make a fool out of me.

I look around me to pass the time. The school gate is old and rusted. Most of the green paint has been pealed off long ago so now it's just a dull grey. It's covered in bird poop and the lock is busted, most likely by some of the upper class man who sneak off campus to take drugs. Next to it is a brick wall which I'm sitting on. The wall isn't much cleaner than the gate but I don't care, my school uniform is never clean anyway.

I start to study my uniform seen as there's nothing left to look at around me. It's all a very boring, depressing black. Black blazer, black jumper, black trousers, a white shirt and a dark green tie as if to make it more exciting. Why is it that uniforms are supposed to make us all look the same and yet the other people in my class act like they're better? That sounds really weird, doesn't it? My mom always used to tell me that I think too deeply into things then come up with the strangest ideas.

That gets me thinking about her again. She always said I was the spitting image of Dad – I had his kind face, his blonde hair and green eyes. I looked nothing like Mom. Sometimes she would get sad when she looked at me because I reminded her of him so much. I wonder what he was actually like-

Suddenly I'm face down in the grass.

I hear cocky laughter so I look up. It's Rena. She's grinning her big, dopey grin.

"Hello...?" I say calmly, raising an eyebrow at her.

Her cackling settles down as she helps me up. "Sorry! Couldn't resist! You looked like you were sleeping with your eyes open."

"I was thinking," I half-smile at her silliness.

"About what?" She questions.

"Just random stuff," I shrug.

"Okay. Anyway, I asked you to meet me here for a very important reason." She booms, getting right to the point.

"Which is...?"

"I want to show you something top secret. You must swear never to reveal it to anyone else or I'll feed you to my Rottweiler."

"You have a Rottweiler?" I frown, more than slightly afraid of the thought of this crazy girl with a large dog.

"No," She smirks. "But promise anyway."

I roll my eyes but I snigger at the same time. It's only then I realize how much Rena makes me smile. I can't remember the last time I've smiled so much. She looks at me, waiting for my answer. She sees that I'm smiling so she can't help smiling herself. Then we both start laughing. Neither of us knows what's funny, we're just laughing for the sake of it, I guess. The laughter goes on for a while until I nod my head and say,

"Alright, I promise."

She looks overjoyed.

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><p><strong>Steve's POV<strong>

I sigh. It's a mix between a sad sigh and an annoyed sigh. I have my hands in the pockets of my baggy, dark green trousers as I kick a can out of frustration. I vent my anger for a little while longer until I'm finally calm enough – or able to pretend I am – to enter Darren's tent. Darren and Sam are sat in the centre of the tent, chatting away so I decide not to disturb the happy couple and go over to join Evra who's doing some shit with his snake.

"Yo," I mutter, looking in the opposite direction and trying to sound nonchalant.

Evra turned away from his snake, looking extremely amused. "Well, if it isn't Mr. Cool Guy! How ya doin', Steve? I haven't seen you around here in a while."

I shrug my shoulders, not even bothering to come up with a witty response. He continues tending to his snake but doesn't stop trying to irritate me.

"So, why aren't you sitting over there with your best friend, Darren?"

I mumble something crude in response.

Evra chuckles. He opens his mouth to tease me more but then, Mr. Crepsley – Darren's mentor – enters the room and I can tell by the look on his face that he doesn't bring good news. Or, I think I can. I swear that guy always looks like someone killed his only love. All eyes in the tent are on him.

"Well, I paid a visit to Desmond Tiny today," He begins.

Darren and Evra look terrified so I ask, "Who's Desmond Tiny?"

"He's a monster!" Evra exclaims.

"He's a guy who has some sort of connection to the Cirque," Darren elaborates. "But he's kind of scary. No-one really knows anything about him – we think that he can control time and creates destiny."

I nod even though I don't really understand.

"As I was saying," Crepsley continues. "I paid a visit to Desmond Tiny today and believe me, that was not very pleasant."

Darren and Evra laugh but I can tell they're afraid.

"He said that, well...Sam is in danger."

"What kind of danger? He's not going to die, is he?" I could hear how agitated Darren was in his voice. He put an arm around Sam who just sat there with wide eyes.

"I will be truthful, it is most likely he will succumb to such a fate. But there is something you boys can do, but unfortunately I may not assist you."

"What do we have to do? I'd do anything for Sam!" Darren barks.

"Me too! Just as long as I don't have to confront Mr. Tiny." Evra shivers.

"You must execute someone." Crepsley tries to say it as if it's no big deal but he doesn't look any of us in the eye.

"Execute? As in kill?" Darren gasps.

"Duh," I say.

"Who?" He inquires.

"As of now, I do not know. Desmond just said that he was an old apprentice of his – neither human, vampire or vampaneze. He said he shall send someone in the near future to inform us of the details."

Darren just nods sadly. Sam's eyes are still wide open and Evra looks kind of pale, which is pretty weird considering he has green skin. I just try to keep my usual cool expression – I don't know really know how to react.

"It is your decision whether you want to aid Sam in his task or not – Desmond claims that none of you are obliged to take part. I will leave you now, I will be in my coffin if you need me."

And with that, the red-haired vampire turned on his heel and left, leaving complete silence in his wake.

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><p><strong>AN: **Review, my squishies! Message me, favourite this story, put it on alert! Please ;A;


	9. Pickled Onions on Memory Lane

**A/N** Well, hi FF! I don't know what to say ;w; I saw something posted the other day which made me realize how much I missed the Darren Shan fandom and writing fanfiction, which caused me to creep back onto FF and read some of my old fics. Most made me cringe with embarrassment but this one, I want to continue. I was also flattered by the kind reviews I was receiving even when I was inactive and I realized how much I missed all the amazing friends I've made via fanfiction. I hope you guys are still around and will talk to me ;w; Anyway, that's my ranting over. Please enjoy this chapter! And I hope to update more often!

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><p><strong>Sam's Memories<strong>

"Where are you taking me?" I ask, trying to keep up with Rena. I know it's no use though – she has so much energy. We're in a part of town I didn't even know existed; it's just grass as far as the eye can see. The grass is overgrown and I have to pay very close attention to where I'm stepping due to the amount of unintelligible items hiding within it but it's still kind of relaxing. Blue skies and no-one around but the two of us - I almost don't care that I should be in school right now.

She's several paces ahead of me, looking completely care-free. She turns around and winks at me. "Somewhere special."

"Where you hide the bodies?" I joke, the corners of my mouth jerking up.

"No, but it might be where your body ends up if you tell anybody about it." She counters.

She advances on. I no longer bother to try to keep up and just enjoy the atmosphere, keeping a steady pace after her. She pauses whenever I stray too far behind, laughing at me and calling me a slow-poke. Then she continues skipping. This goes on until we arrive at this "special place" of hers.

It's an abandoned railway station. The grass and weeds are even more overgrown here – you can barely see the damaged railway tracks beneath them. There are deserted train carriages and bits of broken class and other debris coated all over the ground. I turn to Rena.

"Where are we?" I ask sheepishly.

"Home sweet home!" She beams, hands on hips.

"You _live_ here?" I choke.

"Nope!" She replies. "This is just where I hang out most of the time. I like it here because most people don't even know it exists so I can come here whenever I want."

"That sounds nice," I muse. "I wish I had somewhere I could run off to when it all gets too much."

She looks at me seriously for a moment and I think I see a hint of empathy in her gaze but her normal arrogant form is back in a matter of seconds.

"Well, that's why I brought you here, stupid."

I smile. "Thanks a lot, Rena."

She turns her back to me and looks up at the sky. "Well, it's not really that big a deal."

"Not just for bringing me here," I state. "I never did thank you for saving me yesterday. So thank you."

"Whatever," She grumbles before suddenly spinning around. She grabs both of my hands and looks me dead in the eyes. "Hey, wanna play a game?

Not even caring what it is, I just smile softly and nod my head.

* * *

><p><strong>Sam's POV<strong>

Another day, another strange place I find myself in. I'm walking home now. We've been in this particular town for almost a week now so I've pretty much found my way around with Steve's 'help'.

I think Steve is especially annoyed with me this time. Last night Mr. Tall told us that since Steve would be staying with us permanently the two of us would be sharing a tent from now on. At the time he just mumbled something under his breath and trudged off but this morning I found myself half-way across town.

I actually don't mind Steve much. Sure, he picks on me and ties me to trees but I think that's just his way of talking. I'm also pretty sure that he's a little bothered by how much time Darren and I spend together but I don't think he outright hates me. Even he seemed a little less...Steve-ish when Mr. Crepsley told us about what happened with Mr. Tiny.

Evra and Darren are worried out of their minds. I hate it. I'm the kind of person who can't stand to see other people suffering. I insisted that they don't have to help me but they were determined (even though Evra was shaking in his scales).

I don't know how this Mr. Tiny guy expects me to kill whoever that person is. His ex-apprentice or whatever. I've never so much as been in a fist fight with another boy at school – Rena always looked out for me. I almost wish that the others would forget about me and just let me die from this weird vampire disease. My only regret would be not being able to see Rena again before I die.

I reach into my jeans pocket and take out the battered piece of paper that I bring everywhere with me. It still has the blood and tears imprinted on it from the time I first read it. I smile at it sadly then fold it back up and return it gently to my pocket, my mind totally lost in Memory Lane.

I decide to stop off at a local supermarkets to buy myself a jar of pickled onions.

* * *

><p><strong>Evra's POV<strong>

"Yo,"

Steve walks into the tent uninvited then casually walks over to Darren's side and starts going through his things. Darren is out training with Mr. Crepsley at the moment. Sam showed up a while ago munching on pickled onions. He seemed upset but when I asked him about he just said he was fine then retired to his tent.

"Um, excuse me?" I say, raising an eyebrow at him.

He ignores me and carries on rummaging through Darren's stuff.

"What are you doing with Darren's stuff?" I ask.

"Lookin' through it." He answers simply.

"But why?" I press.

"Because I want to."

I sigh. "Steve, what is it with you and Darren?"

"I don't know what you mean." He hums, looking carefully at one of Darren's comic books.

"You're jealous of Sam, right?" I tease.

He can't think of a response so he grabs Darren's pillow and launches it at me.

I sneer. "Don't worry, your secret is safe with me."

"I don't care either way!" He lies.

"Mhm."

Steve presses on, turning up Darren's side of the tent as if he owns the place.

"Are you looking for something in particular?" I enquire.

He only grunts in response but when he lifts something up as if it's a newborn baby I know I'm right. It's small and he has his back to me so I can't quite see what the object is.

"What's that?" I buzz, trying to get a closer look.

"None of your business," He drawls as he gets up and exits the tent, taking the item with him.

"What if Darren asks what happened to his stuff?" I call after him.

There's no answer.

"What a weirdo," I huff.


	10. Cut All Ties

_A/N:_ Hi again! I actually did update relatively soon after the last chapter this time! I'm really enjoying writing this! I think I might go back over the old chapters and rewrite them. I won't change anything important, but just try and fix certain things, considering the first few chapters of this story were written around two years ago when I had no idea where I actually wanted it go and it was more than a little bit random. I also changed the title. Anyway, *reads over this chapter* this story has taken a rather depressing turn, hasn't it? Well, I hope you enjoy it anyway!

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><p><strong>Sam's Memories<strong>

It happened when I least expected it.

I'd just started to get used to having Rena around. Every morning I'd come into school as normal, sometimes she'd show up and other times she wouldn't. On the days she'd show up we'd usually cut class and sneak off to the railway station. We'd hang out there and find something to amuse ourselves with. It was never dull when she was around. The school had called my mom and _him _about it several times but no-one really seemed to care. I had no idea about what Rena's family was like though.

On the days she didn't show up it was harder. The kids in my class made fun of me even more now that I was friends with her, constantly asking me if she was a boy or a girl and jeering at me for whatever reason they could come up with at the time. Most of the time I was able to block it all out, thinking of Rena and all the things I'd have to tell her once she came back into school.

But then one cold Friday evening as I was walking home from school, cursing my poor decision not to bring a coat it suddenly hit me that Rena had been absent from school every single day that week. She'd never been away that long before, or at least not since we'd become friends. Previously, even if she'd been away for only one day she'd send me a stupid text message to let me know she was all right. Usually something a long the lines of, "hey sam wat i mis iz the teachre still a butface? lol", spelling errors and all.

I pulled out my mobile phone just to be sure. Yep, nothing.

I carried on walking, still staring unseeingly at the phone in my hand. I thought about Rena – her weird, goofy grin and her boisterous attitude. I tried not to worry too much, after all she was a really tough girl. I imagined some big, creepy guy in a trench coat approaching her in the dead of night and her going all kung-fu on him and kicking him in the nuts. I laughed softly to myself at the thought.

Suddenly I realized I could feel grass beneath my feet. I looked up. I was on the field, nearby the railway station where Rena and I had been so many times over the last few months. I shook my head and smiled, how did my feet lead me here without me noticing? Either way, I was nearly there so I figured I'd stop by Rena and my "hide-out" just in case she was there.

Unsurprisingly, she wasn't. I was in no hurry to get home so I aimlessly walked along the tracks for a while. It was probably pretty dangerous looking back on it but it'd been there so many times over the past how-long that I could practically find my way around the place with my eyes closed so I wasn't worried. I'd stop every few seconds just to stare into space and fondly remember my good times with Rena.

It was while I was staring into space one time that I noticed a piece of paper on one of the tracks, fighting against the rock it was under to fly off into the wind. Curious, I walked over to it and removed the rock, careful not to let the piece of paper blow away.

At the top of the page in big, bold, capital letters with an uncanny amount of exclamation marks read my name in what I knew was Rena's less-than-neat handwriting. A smile appeared on my face but it was gone as soon as I began to read the rest of the note:

"_I'm really hoping you get this! I really wanted to say goodbye properly but it wasn't possible. Don't worry, I'm not hurt or anything! It's just, well, there's no point in me being here. In this town, with people I don't fit in with. You actually have a future ahead of you - you're really smart and a good kid so maybe it's best that you don't hang out with a delinquent like me who's always getting you to ditch school and stuff! Did I spell that right? Anyway, I'm really sorry I have to leave, Sam. I really enjoyed spending these past few months with you. I've never ever had a friend like you before and I probably never will again. You're like a brother to me, Sam! I'll miss you! You're always saying how I smell like pickled onions, if you ever miss me then buy a jar of them and take a sniff – you won't even know I'm gone! Also, don't try to call me because I don't have my phone any more. I won't need it where I'm going! ~Love Rena" _

I don't really know how to describe what happened next. I kind of blacked out. I just remember hearing this horrible screeching noise like the time with the fire back then. I think I was running too. Yes, I was running but everything was blurry. Maybe it was because of the tears in my eyes. I don't know. As I got into the busier parts of town I was vaguely aware of people's eyes on me – some looking horrified, others concerned, others amused. But at the time I didn't care - I just had to keep running.

When I arrived at my house no-one was home. It was just as well. I shot in, ran into the bathroom and locked the door behind me. I sat in the bathtub with my clothes still on, staring at the letter from Rena, tears still spilling out of my eyes.

_You knew this would happen, _a voice inside of my head said. _No-one ever cares about you._

"Shut up!" I said aloud. "Rena does care!"

_Then why did she leave you? _the voice said. _She hates you._ _Just like everybody else. _

The last four words seemed to echo in my head.

_Just like everybody else._

_Like everybody else._

_Everybody else._

_Like Mom. _

_Like _him_._

_Like everyone in my class._

_Like all the teachers._

_Like everybody else._

After that I blacked out again. When I finally came to I was still sat in the bath, but this time in a pool of blood with a razor-blade in my right hand and a new stinging sensation in both my wrists.

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><p><strong>Sam's POV<strong>

_Hey, Rena._

_How are things going for you?_

_I'm still at the Cirque du Freak and everyone is all tense. That Mr. Tiny guy is finally sending someone over to tell me about my 'mission' or whatever today. On the upside I'm down to only throwing up 4 times a day now! That could be either a good thing or a bad thing..._

_Darren and Evra are doing fine. Well, as fine as you can be when some creepy dude is poisoning your room mate. And Steve is okay, I think. He hasn't poked me with any sharp objects lately... Mr. Crepsley is as stern-faced as ever. _

_Anyway, that's all for now. See you soon._

_~Love Sam_

I hit the send button and I'm about to turn my phone off and return it to my pocket but one of the icons on the screen, with the word 'photos' beneath it catches my eye. I touch on it and the three photos I have in my album are revealed.

The first one is a picture of my mom, obviously taken before _he _arrived because she actually looks happy. She's balancing a stuffed dog on her head (most likely placed there by a younger me who would've thought that kind of thing hilarious) but she's modelling it as if it's the most expensive designer hat. She's laughing and I imagine I would've been laughing too as I took the picture.

The second is a stupid selfie I took in front of the mirror while I was bored. I skip to the next one.

It's a picture of Rena and me. Or rather Rena, with me as a background image. She's making a dumb face right in front of the camera lens while I giggle behind her. Smiling sadly, I make the picture my wallpaper then turn off my phone and shove it back into my pocket.

I stay there for a while, unmoving. I'm alone in mine and Steve's tent, only that jar of pickled onions I bought yesterday to keep me company. I pick it up from where it's resting next to me and unscrew the lid. I inhale deeply and almost instantly my eyes fill with tears. When I see someone enter the tent I quickly wipe my eyes and return the jar to where it was originally. It's Darren.

"Hey, Sam."

For a second his bright, blue eyes lock with my green ones and it's really surreal. We both know exactly what the other is thinking, we can both sense each others' fear. I imagine the others are outside, feeling exactly the same. The blood is completely drained from Darren's face but he somehow forces a smile.

"I think he's here." He says simply and there's no need for any further clarification. I get up from where I'm seated and follow him out of the tent to meet my doom.

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><p><em>AN: _This chapter was rather short, I think but the next one will be when it all finally starts going down! Also, thank you for the reviews on the last chapter! I was pleasantly surprised when I logged on one day to find that this story now has 50 reviews! I love the Shandom so much *single tear drop*. Anyway, some of the people who reviewed last time were guests so I'm going to reply here.

_Samuel Peterson: _You okay, bro? o.O

_Andre: _No problem at all! Thank you for reading and reviewing!


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